Fears About the Future

I worry. I’m a worrier when I want to be a warrior, but I can’t help it when my mind wanders to all of the potential ways I could utterly screw up my life. I worry that I’ll fall into a certain group of friends and make bad decisions in college. I worry that I’ll be too lazy to take advantage of office hours and lose to opportunity to be mentored by great minds. I worry that I’ll cope with stress in negative ways that’ll wreak havoc on my health. I worry that I won’t find good friends and end up being lonely for the rest of my life.

I worry that in trying to choose where to live, Korea or America, I’ll either lose the opportunity to have a stunning career or lose my family. I worry that my future aspirations are not the greatest fit for me. I worry that I’ll marry the wrong person. I worry that I’m constantly facing an all too imminent death: that one day I’ll be in the wrong place at the wrong time, or neglect my seatbelt, or make a wrong turn, and find myself tumbling towards a terrifying realization of my own mortality.

I worry, I worry, I worry.

I know I’m not alone in this: I suspect all the graduating classes of 2019 from around the world hold similar fears regarding the uncertainty of what lies ahead. Gone will be familiarity of home: here comes four years of turbulence, toil, and thrill.

I hope I’m ready for this.

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